Well, Crap.

To be perfectly honest, the only thing I feel like saying is:

"Damn it. Damn it all."

But, I suppose it would be bad manners to say that and leave, so I'll explain.

I had my ultrasound w/Dr. Wiz today. We were supposed to be checking on follies for Saturday's IUI. (my second.)

I had 11. None of them were bigger than 10mm. Apparently, my body just doesn't respond to Clo.mid.

This cycle is a bust before it ever even really started.

Dr. Wiz thinks that next cycle, we should do injectables instead of clo.mid. Fine with me, but the cost goes up about $1300. We weren't prepared for that. Especially since the cryobank raised the price of sp.erm.

We're now looking at June for our next try. I start Pro.vera tomorrow. I told Dr. Wiz that if I was going to be paying so much more money, I wanted to do an HSG first. We're looking at doing that as soon as AF leaves.

I am so pissed at myself. My body was supposed to work. This was the part that was supposed to go right. Instead, I have a body that apparently can't produce quality follicles and can't ovulate on it's own. I wonder what else is wrong.

Please keep me in your prayers. I can feel my optimism leaking away. The future is looming, dark and childless, and I can't seem to make my view of it change.