I've been waiting to use that line as a post title for a while now. I love it. It's from Hamlet 2 and it describes exactly how I'm feeling.
I have been trying so hard not to think about this 2WW, the IUI, or the results of said IUI. It's not working. My thoughts are constantly on babies...er...baby. Sorry Jeff. (His mantra is "Only one".) Really, I'll take whatever, as long as they're healthy. But I digress...
I am really struggling with keeping my hope on a leash this time. I keep thinking "Well, there were four follicles, how could I not get pregnant?" I know that is not the best thing to think. But I really don't want to lose all hope. I mean, it seemed like everything went well. And while I have been doing so well about not searching for phantom pregnancy symptoms (blue veins, anyone?) I will swear to you that I could smell Jeff's shampoo this morning while he was in the shower. Through the shower door, the bathroom door, and the sheet covering my face as I tried to stay asleep. And then I have to tell myself IT'S ONLY BEEN 5 DAYS.
Technically, AF should show up on July 1st, or I POAS July 1st. I'm thinking that if AF doesn't show, I'm not testing until the next day. July 1st is my mom's 50th birthday, and I don't want to be an absolute downer all day if it's negative. Instead, I guess I'll just be really distracted.
Please, keep me in your thoughts. I bounce back and forth from daydreams about painting nurseries (nursery Jeff...I said nursery) to plans of spending the first week in July in bed weeping. Surely there's a happy medium out there somewhere.